THERAGAMES : GAME LEADERS

When children are targetted for extra help in developing socio-emotional skills, then a skilled game leader is required in order to ensure a meaningful, therapeutic experience is provided. The skill of the game leader determines the quality of the experiential and therapeutic nature of the game. By modelling skills and coaching for emotional control, leaders guide children to a deeper level of experience. Game leaders are needed who have high emotional intelligence and build supportive environments around children, increasing their emotional resilience. The following skills and attitudes are important to the role of game leader:

Modelling prosocial skills

Game leaders look for opportunities to model prosocial skills, eg, using manners, taking turns, saying sorry and resolving conflicts in friendly ways etc. Mimes, scripts and little roleplays are used to show children what standing assertively looks like, what adaptive self-talk sounds like, how to seek help or what 'brag' means, for example. Leaders also look for and refer to peers who are using prosocial skills during the game Smiling, having fun and being respectful are also modelled.

Using scripts

Language is central to the human experience, allowing communication with self and others, and guiding our construction of reality. There is reciprocity between the words we use and the attitudes we hold. Consider the following statements:

• "I'm telling the teacher on you"
• "I'm getting help from the teacher"

The first statement contains a reference to a social 'no-no' amongst children that may stifle help seeking and implies punishment or trouble. Using this statement may lead to the child being labeled a 'dibber-dobber' or 'tail-teller' and holds the stigma of 'being a baby' or not being able to cope. In the second statement the word 'help' contains the commonly accepted notion of helping those in need and the social acceptability of seeking help when it is needed. Even adults seek help from friends, or in extreme cases the police, if they are being harassed. When a child approaches a teacher with the words "Excuse me, I need help", they are more likely to elicit assistance from the teacher than when they say "Johnny's picking on me" in a whining voice.

While playing the games, leaders carefully choose language that reflects respect, calmness and confidence. Non-judgmental language encourages children to take responsibility for their actions and develop empathy for others. Scripts of adaptive self-talk are also used by leaders to help children learn language patterns that will assist self-monitoring. Vygotsky (1962) observed that children's self-talk or inner speech seemed to have a self-monitoring function. Scripts are samples of self-talk that children can use when dealing with problems such as anger, frustration or conflict. Scripts allow children to learn and use new word patterns that form the basis of new thought constructs. Teaching scripts to children provides them with ideas and adaptive self-talk to use in future problem-solving situations. Scripts should be simple and positive and reflect concepts such as control and calmness. Following are script samples that are presented as examples only and should be altered to fit local word usage:

• Oh well, not every one can go first - I'll be first some other time
• It's hard but I can wait for my turn
• Don't worry about it, calm down, it's not worth getting upset about
• What could we try to solve this problem?

Further script samples are provided with each game.

Verbal reinforcers

Specific positive comments made to children during the game are a powerful way to reinforce prosocial skills and build positive self-concepts. Verbal reinforcers need to be specific, immediate and applied liberally to be effective, eg

• I like the way you kept trying to work out solutions
• It's great that you waited for your turn even though it was hard
• Good listening (waiting, sharing, helping, encouraging, comforting, etc.).
• Thank you for sharing (waiting listening, being kind, etc)
• That was a fair (kind, friendly, etc) thing to do
• I can see being fair (honest, helpful, etc.) is important to you

Immediacy

Leaders constantly look for teachable moments. When a child uses a prosocial skill, that the leader wishes to reinforce in others, a verbal reinforcement is given immediately. When a player lands on a teaching point in the game, the leader draws attention to it through discussion. Likewise, when interpersonal conflict arises, the leader halts the game and leads the disputants through the emotional control (as needed) and problem solving process. Leaders may wish to orchestrate 'mini crises' to create teachable moments, eg, asking who wants to go first. Almost every child will want to go first, thus creating a conflict between players. This gives the leader the opportunity to lead a problem solving discussion about fair ways of deciding who goes first. Children will have a myriad of ideas of how to choose the first player which would have been lost if the leader simply chose the first player. It also allows the leader to make scripted comments like 'it doesn't matter if you don't go first', 'everyone gets a turn', 'I'll just wait for my turn', etc. Leaders may call upon children who did not care if they went first or not to explain why it did not matter, thus providing peer models of alternative responses. Leaders may also surreptitiously stack the cards in order to direct the play ­ but don't get caught!

Discipline

Negotiate rules such as turn taking, talking quietly and listening to each other at the beginning of the game. Most are eager to play and will cooperate and encourage others to keep the rules. Model the rules, eg, waiting silently and patiently for children to listen after having asked them to listen. Suggesting that they will have to come back in the next break will motivate those who do not like giving up lunch breaks to solve problems. Use emotional coaching to help children work through crises. If the group is too unruly, stop the game saying, in a matter of fact manner, 'Let's try again next week'. Let the children know you would really like to play the game with them. Ask them what sorts of things would help make it easier to play the game next week. Reduce the group size and include a child with strong prosocial skills. This prosocial child's position could be rotated amongst the other children in the class who are keen to be included in a game.

Curious stance

An attitude of curiosity helps when dealing with crises. Being neutral, respectful, supportive and un-emotive will help establish a stress free environment in which children can try out their new skills.

Awareness of reading skills

In order to avoid embarrassment, leaders need to help poor readers without drawing attention to their difficulties. It is good practice for the game leader to offer to read out all hints, strategies and concepts discovered during the game. Curiously, children will often insist on reading their own cards, even if they have trouble with reading. Some concepts will need explanation and discussion to ensure understanding.

Incentives

Every child player wins a prize. Children enjoy receiving something as simple as a sticker or an award or a lucky dip at the end of the game. This adds to the fun and motivation and ameliorates the pain of not finishing first in the game.